Like I needed to say that! However, many people want the prize of leader-ship without having to scrub the deck! So often I see people and (I used to be one) who wanted to the prize without the price, the position without the process! Being a leader is hard and don't let anyone tell you any different.
Trying to be a leader who is always liked is even harder, because it's impossible. The fact is that leaders have to make hard decisions that may not get as many "likes" as a funny video on facebook, if any likes at all. But decisions have to be made and someone has to make them. Whether you are leading a family or an organization, if there is to be forward progress then difficult intersections have to be navigated.
The key, for me, is "the greater good" and "leading with Love". Just because I have to make hard choices doesn't mean it has to be absent of the precepts of 1 Corinthians 13! Beware though, even if you do everything right in a hard decision (or at least you think you did) it won't satisfy everyone. So in my journey of leadership, I've had to develop "thick Love skin"!
What do I mean by that? Well, I'm glad you asked!
It means to me that I can't get my feelings hurt or wear my feelings on my sleeve and at the same time, try like all get out to portray love in those tough times of decision making. Does it always work... nope! But when it's over I can sleep well, knowing I tried to lead with Love. And let's face it, sometimes... well, many times we have to fight through strong emotions and feelings while delivering what we believe to be the right direction.
So whether it's in the home with our kids or in a company that we lead, we must exalt Love as the primary expression of who we are. We have to believe and do this in faith because it's counter-intuitive to the worlds model of leading, which is usually to step on whoever and whatever is necessary to climb the ladder of success. The problem with that is the hurt bodies pile up quickly, so have to avoid at all cost, hurting people on the way to helping people!
Now I know some people will read this and think "Yeah, I've been the one who was hurt!" But instead of thinking that, because I've been in that position too, you might think about your own actions and how they affect others. We're all leading to some extent and are responsible for our own actions, not those of others. There's an old expression that goes "lean on your own fried chicken" which simply means pay attention to your own life and affairs and quit trying to tell everyone else how they are doing it wrong. After all, if someone is blatantly successful, then maybe I should start watching for the keys of their success and stop complaining about how I don't agree with how the succeed. Either that, or find another vision to support and follow.
I've learned in my short time of leading that I have to own my mistakes and move forward and not blame others for my shortcomings and failures.
Hope this helps, I know it helped me!
Barry